As I come out of the shower this morning, I say a silent thank you to my wonderful friend Jennifer in the UK who has launched a fabulous range of mummy and baby products called ‘Boo Boo’ (http://www.boobooshop.co.uk/). I thank the ‘Soft and Creamy Body Smoother’ for helping my latest scars to fade and congratulate the lovely Jenn for creating something so fabulous. Must email her and put in an order, as I’ll be seeing her in London in a few weeks time. Can’t wait!
I pack the kids off to school, with some rice flour pasta, salami and mixed veg in their lunchboxes. C seems to be getting used to the fact that lunchboxes these days are not as exciting as they used to be. He isn’t complaining, but he also comes home ravenous and eats like a horse the minute he walks through the door.
It’s pouring of rain and I stomp to my yoga class in highly inappropriate woolly Uggs – probably the least waterproof footwear that I own, but it feels wintery today and so somehow it makes sense to be wearing them. The dog tags along with me and I step in a huge puddle as I let him out of the car for a quick pee before I go into my class. Ughhh. (or – Ugg!)energy,
My yoga intention today is ‘fulfillment’ and ‘energy’. I’m no longer satisfied with just healing and concentrating on getting through my every day. I want to flop into the sofa at the end of every day feeling fulfilled, feeling as if I’ve gotten as much out of the day as is possible and feeling that I’ve left no room to say ‘I wish I would have done that, but didn’t get around to doing it’. I figure that in order to find fulfillment in my everydayness, I also need a stash of energy to allow me to do all of the things that I want to do. The battle against cancer drained that energy for such a long time, that I’m only just discovering what it is like to have energy again and how it feels to want more of it. It’s a good feeling – I like it. I pay homage to my friend Jane (http://www.janegouldyoga.com/) – for introducing me to yoga, for introducing me to the doctor who has looked at C’s problems holistically and for teaching me that it’s ok to tell your friends that you love them every now and again. And as crazy as it sounds, I have a moment filled with joy. Joy for the here and now. Joy for being here to tell the tale – whatever that tale may be.
As I come out of my class the rain stops and I take Milo to his version of doggy nirvana – the Mill Valley dog park. He is so happy to be there and almost looks at me in disbelief, as if he’d already accepted that today was going to be a non-event as soon as it started pouring with rain.
I then drive up the 101 to the Corte Madeira Mall to buy a t-shirt for my godsons’ birthday. He apparently thinks I’m good at buying him cool clothes. No pressure! I put on my cool godmother head and go to The Gap. A huge shopping bag filled with a stash of gifts in preparation for my upcoming trip to Europe later, I take off to the next Freeway exit to buy a new electric kettle. My kettle broke almost 2 weeks ago. A complete disaster. Being English and having a kettle pretty much go hand in hand and boiling water in a pan really doesn’t do it for me. I take my 20% off voucher to Bed Bath and Beyond and am at the check-out, super proud of myself that I’m walking out with only the item that I went in there to buy (a virtual impossibility for me in this store, for some strange reason – or any store, my husband would probably argue) and the girl at the cash till persuades me to buy their new super foaming screen cleanser. What? Why? Yes, yes, yes. It seemed like a good idea when I thought of the constant kids grubby fingerprints on the computer screen… Sad.
I go home and pop a Bob’s Red Mill Gluten Free Bread Mix into the bread machine before I leave to pick up T to go for his 4-year old check up with the pediatrician. T passes his examination with a clean bill of health. He has a couple of shots and isn’t best pleased about it, so I promise him a Jamba Juice. I discuss the whooping cough scenario at C’s school with the doctor and he recommends a course of antibiotics if C has had direct exposure. I’m not one for taking antibiotics unless they are really necessary, but the thought of dealing with Whooping Cough just as we are heading off to Europe is not a good one and I tell myself to remember to email C’s teacher when I get home to check on whether he has indeed been directly exposed or not.
We pick up C from school with a Jamba Juice in hand and we troop off to the library to make the confession about the Stuart Little DVD and offer up the new copy that I’d ordered on Amazon about 5 minutes after T snapped it in half. They accept the new copy, but it turns out they would rather I had just given them the money for it. I still pay the $6 processing fee – love the way they don’t call it a ‘fine’.
We come home to the smell of freshly baked bread, but I take it out of the machine and it is a disaster. It hasn’t mixed properly and the salvageable part tastes more like a pancake than bread. A big disappointment all round – especially to my hungry kids. I remember that I’d tried the same mix a month or so ago, when I suspected that going g-free might help C, and we didn’t really like it then because it tasted too eggy. I vow only to buy the Pamela’s bread mix from now on (http://www.pamelasproducts.com/).
As I go to put a Trader Joes organic sirloin steak into the oven (my theoretically easy, no fuss meal idea of the week). I realize that it’s been marinated and the marinade has soy sauce with wheat in it. What to do? I’ve promised the boys steak. Do I carry on as is, or do we eat out? Is eating out an option? Do I even know where to get a good g-free meal yet? Arghhhh. I cook the meat. Again, I count my lucky stars that we are not dealing with an allergy to gluten.
After dinner, I bundle the kids into the car and take them for a Reiki session at the Tibetan Healing Center (http://www.tibetanacademy.org) in Sausalito. Have I gone mad? Have I been living in Marin for too long and have turned into a complete hippy? No. None of the above. Through cancer I’ve come to believe in the healing power of the mind. I’ve learned first hand about channeling my own energy to fuel my own healing. I‘ve seen what a difference being calm and balanced means to me as a mother – and to my kids. I took C to a Reiki session a month ago when I was still utterly perplexed about how he was feeling and was desperate to find a solution to his gastrointestinal issues. He loved it so much that he asked to come back again. He said that it was the most relaxed he’d ever felt in his life and slept like a dream afterwards. Right now I’ll do anything to make him feel happy and nurtured. Didi, the Reiki master is incredible. C adores her. The kids are amazing. T cuddles up with me and doesn’t say a word for an hour. C leaves empowered, happy and calm.
A good nights sleep is in store for us all. Well – all except M who is still in the Peninsula at 11pm. No rest for the wicked.